How to Take a Date Home to Your Place or Hers

Everyone scratches their heads when they plan the first date, and that’s a big reason most people don’t advance the date to the next level.  Today I’m going to tell you how I personally make moves to take a date to my place, or hers, after the very first date.

Scoring on the first date

Let’s face it, most (guys at least) sit around looking at questions to ask their date, as well as picking the best spot for the inaugural date.

I like to think outside the box, and for this reason, I like to think ahead and wonder where the date will end up.

If a girl likes you, you’ll know.  However, most women – unless they are on the wild side or intoxicated, won’t hook up with you in public.  I know it sounds weird in 2017 to say this, but some women are bashful to even kiss in public, fearing that people around may take notice and spark rumors.  Even if you are making out like it’s prom night in a public place, how far can you really get?  Even having sex in a car or closet isn’t that fun when compared to what you can do at home.

You need a game plan that includes what most smart businessmen think of – an exit strategy.

With this in place, you can either take your date to your house, or hers, and continue to work on doing the damn thing.

Planning Ahead

The biggest player fail I’ve seen is when guys go over the top on a date destination, but fail to think through the logic of where it’s geographically located in terms of relativity to either one of their houses.  If you have your own place, or have privacy, then the obvious option is to bring the date to your place.  I call this home court advantage.  You know what you are up against, or should I say, what may bring the mood down, well in advance of heading there.  If you don’t know her living situation, you could run into all sorts of unexpected stuff ranging from a clingy roommate, a cock-blocking neighbor, or worse, parents!

Player Tip:  You should know your date well enough before you go out to understand if she has roommates.

Once you identify the pro’s and con’s of whose house would be ideal for a hook-up, you then pick a location within close proximity to that spot.

Figure Out Where to Meet

Sometimes the best place to start a date is where you want to end it, if that makes sense.  If you have her come to your place, it could create a lot of trust prior to even going out.  If you have nice digs, you know that should impress her.  At the end of the day, she’ll also be likely to leave her car there which means the date ends at your place.

This is about building a foundation of trust.  When you simply ask her to come home with you after you’ve gone out, it’s a crap shoot.  However, if she’s seen your place, and it’s not a hot mess, you’ll increase the likelihood of a post-date Ron-dez-vous.

Player Tip:  If you meet at your place, have her enter your place while you finish getting ready.  She’ll be stoked to see photos of your family, your friends, and any fantasy football trophies you’ve collected.  (Or not.)  Just don’t be that guy who makes her wait an hour.

Alternatively, if you meet at her spot, you can ask for water or a trip to the bathroom to wash your hands.   (I never say to use the toilet, I always blame some stuff I touched somewhere and that I want to wash my hands, even if it’s to use the bathroom.  Just don’t enter and take a #2!)  When you do this, make sure to tell her you like the home, and pick out a single item that is of interest to you and commend her on it.

I’ve had dates that started at a home, and a “quick drink” led to much more.  While this is rare, it can really change things quickly and you may just scrap your date and stay there.  That’s never a bad thing.

How to Handle the Date

First off, always remember to be relaxed and have fun.  When you have fun, there is much more of a chance you’ll get some physical contact in.  Even something as easy as giving high fives creates that human touch.  Holding hands is obviously a great sign of things to come and a trust builder as well.

When you speak to her, share things like what motivates you, where you came from, and who you look up to.  This will help her understand who you are as a person and again, create trust.  If you have any photos of important people in your life, briefly show them to her.  However, avoid being that guy who shows every photo he’s ever taken for a good hour, as that gets boring.  Also make sure to get rid of any incriminating pics or naked pics other women have sent you prior to opening up your phone!

When you share your stories, naturally she should delve into hers. If she doesn’t, this is the time to ask questions.

If you are having dinner and things are going well, you need to extend the date and ask her if she’d mind spending more time with you.  I’ve thought long and hard about my best advice to give guys on how to bring a girl home after one date, and there are many ways this can be accomplished, but when you get to that step where you need to simply ask the question, here’s a few of my best lines:

“I live very close as you know, would you like to meet that adorable dog you were admiring in the photos?”

“This is really a good time, I’d really like to continue spending time with you.  If you agree, we could hang out at my place.”

“Do you like anything on NetFlix?  We could easily order up some episodes and have a night cap.”

Again, there are many ways to go with this talk, but at the end of the day I avoid being basic and just saying “hey do you want to go to my place?”

How to End The Date With a Bang

So your in there like swimwear, and she is going to head back to your place.  Job well done, thus far.

Remember what spark led her to be attracted to you this far along, and circle back to it.  Whether it was some music you mutually liked, a certain cocktail, or something on NetFlix.  Make sure that the positive vibes you had before are re-kindled and shared again.  Make sure she is comfortable at your house and that you are a good host.

Whatever you do, don’t rush into trying to hook up with her.  This is a turn off and could backfire.  Continue to be a gentleman, even if her DD’s are staring at you and asking you to motor boat them.

You Old Sailor You

Start with things like touching hands, rubbing her leg, and touching her hair.  Touching her in a sensual way is much better than being that deviant who tries to stick his tongue down her throat before you’ve even given her a peck on the cheek.

Build momentum with little moves like this.  Be nice to her, take it slow, and if she’s giving you all the signs and waving you beyond third base, go for gold as your testosterone takes over.

If you follow these tips on bringing a date back to your place, you should increase your overall success rate in dating, whether you meet people organically or find your flings online, which is really what this website is all about.




Tom Savage is a serial dater living in Miami Beach, Florida. In between pool parties, late nights, and an occasional day trading session, he likes to share his tips on meeting women online. You can contact Tom on this page.

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