Backpage Miami Escorts – Reasons To Not Hire Them!

As you know we’re all about getting in them guts any time we can. Sometimes Barret and I will go to extremes to make that happen. Well, recently we decided to give the Miami Backpage a shot. The problem is that it sucks and we had a horrible time. So, that being said, you know where we are going with this. Just keep reading to get the scoop on everything.

Like I said, we’re going to focus on Backpage Miami Escorts. Before we get started, know that some of what we’re about to share might be more than a little NSFW. Experiencing sites like these can be daunting, considering the types of adult service they offer. Typically we don’t even get into the type of detail that we plan on in this article, but we feel compelled based on the experiences we had with Backpage Miami Escorts. So, read on to find out exactly what all the noise is about.

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Our Experiences With Backpage Miami Escorts

Nowadays, no one on our review staff pays for sex. It’s something we all tended to do when we were younger, but as adults, we’re looking for something more substantial. For a lot of us, it tended to be a one-time event, after which we just didn’t return. However, for this review, we’re going to share our Backpage Miami escort service story with you guys. It’s the only way we can convey how absurd the whole experience was.

So on this particular occasion, Barret and I were spending time in Miami on a staycation at one of the fancy hotels on Ocean Drive (not named to not get in trouble). We had our rooms, and on day 3, we decided to stay an extra night and have some more fun on the beach. We knew a few people in town, so there was a good chance of having some interesting experiences.

After we got in that evening, one of us decided it was a good idea to order not one but two Backpage Miami escorts to have some fun.

In retrospect, it was one of their worst escort experiences ever. We almost got arrested while trying to hire these women, and that was only the beginning. The women didn’t show up as a pair as we had expected. Instead, they showed up one at a time which kind of ruined plans.

The first woman to show up looked nothing like her profile, having gained what seemed to be a substantial amount of weight during the time of her photos and now. When the second woman showed up, she wasn’t even the same person shown in the picture. In fact, when question she admitted that the escort service couldn’t reach the woman ordered, and instead just….sent someone else. This second woman also came with her “bodyguard,” who made things significantly more uncomfortable as the night progressed.

So the women argued about the original terms, which was a threesome with each of us. They never did reach an agreement, and eventually one of the women stormed out of the room with her money. That left the one escort in the room, who demanded that her bodyguard be present before any sexual activity occurred.

This was hugely uncomfortable, and pretty much ended the night with us not being able to get aroused. Once they were finished, the bodyguard accused us of not paying enough, so we ended up paying $200 more than originally intended. As far as experiences go, Backpage Miami did a number on us. They sent individuals that looked nothing like the people ordered and didn’t deliver on any of the services they were requested for.

Backpage Miami or Other Options

Believe it or not, a large percentage of American men have used or still do use escorts for sex. That probably won’t change within our lifetimes, so perhaps it’s better to make these services safer and more reliable.

That’s why there are GPS-based services that provide local escort services on a smaller scale. These apps tend to be free and offer the ability to connect with locals who are looking for the same things you are.

Additionally, a lot of these free mobile apps provide the ability to see past experiences with the girls. This way you can at least have a better idea of who you’re looking to connect with before they show up at your door.


All escort sites, including suck big time. They provide no value at all and they will not help you hook up. Instead, you’re better off using one of the sites listed below. They’re casual sex sites with classified adult ads that connect you with local girls for sex and all for free.


Tom Savage is a serial dater living in Miami Beach, Florida. In between pool parties, late nights, and an occasional day trading session, he likes to share his tips on meeting women online. You can contact Tom on this page.

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